Tuesday 11 August 2015

Snappy dragon.

Have you ever wondered why you wake up in a particular frame of mind, or in my case, mood?  I sometimes go to bed with my head in a good place only to wake with a cloud raining on my parade. It is almost as if a dream has left a stain like the ring from a cup. I have learnt over the last few years how to "cope" when it happens, at least most of the time. The exercise I get from my three outings each week has of course helped, the jogging is coming along nicely. I am still very slow, but I am told the important thing at this stage is not speed, but the stamina to keep going for longer, speed comes later. I haven't lost any weight, Mike says it might be because the fat weight has become muscle weight. I feel much fitter, so I'm happy to keep going even if I'm still as heavy as a hippo. 

Yet my mood over the last week or so though has had me snappy, anxious, and tearful. I have been going out for my run, but I have been reluctant to venture out at other times of the day. I am prone to panicking too. The other day Mike couldn't find his keys, he took the spare set and rushed off to dialysis. I then turned the house upside down, rushing around like a headless chicken, even though I knew I should calm down and stop fretting. I just couldn't stop myself. 

Snap dragons. 
I will with time, and a bit of kindness from myself and others, find myself in a good place once more. I always have before.

3 comments:

  1. Aww Lorna. I do hope things get better for you and Mike. You really do seem to be going through it at the moment. Keep strong. We are sending much love your way. Keep up the jogging too......doing well xx

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  2. "It's almost as if a dream has left a stain like the ring from a cup" yes! Sometimes my subconscious thoughts get stirred up and the feelings I'm trying to avoid surprise me upon waking... Not the best.

    I too find being kind to myself helps things fall into a better place, surprising how difficult a little kindness can be.

    Good luck with the jogging, it is something I wish to resume for myself. And your hubby is right about the muscle weight! Have you noticed clothes fitting differently? That's my first sign, not necessarily numbers on a scale. Ugh. Math. Another reason to not like math! :)

    Wishing you better days and better dreams :)

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  3. Keep up the running! It gets better!

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