Tuesday 16 November 2010

Muppet Babies

Well it's been a long nine months for us, but finally labour has started and Lorna and I are looking forward to the imminent birth. With a bit of help from medical science, man is able to create new life. Yes in this case "MAN GIVES BIRTH". Now before you all start knitting, bootees, hats and little jumpers, I'm not talking about the pitter-patter of tiny feet, more the whooshing of millions of tiny stem cells. I have to say that given the pain I'm in,(Co-Codamol 500/30mg x2 has little effect) it had better be worth it!
All the pain, but none of the fun though. Lots of throbbing but no pleasure. I'm sure you girls have probably said that a few times over the years, and it is probably like meat and two veg to you all, but I'm really worried that when I go for my line care on my expertly fitted Central Line on Wednesday, the nurses are going to ask me to PUSH!
It is the dreaded G-CSE....ERM..... G-CSF sorry, (although to want it, you do need your head EXAMINING.) On Sunday I started the 4-a-day injections of Neupogen that will hopefully encourage the birth of 6 million or so baby stem cells that will be used to reboot me after the mustard gas attack planned at Cancer Operational Headquarters, QE., Birmingham on December 6th.
The pain of this war on Myeloma has really come to the fore this week. My bones are throbbin in time to my heartbeat," BOOM BOOM shake ya bones" for those who teen'd in the 70's. Child of the 50's,60's,70's,80's,90's and naughties is what I am. Lorna says I've never grown up. I reckon those stem cells will be more responsible than me, given a week or two. I'm halfway through my course of injections so there will soon be an extra shelf in the fridge again for the cheese to mature on. Lorna wanted it for wine, but I've told her there is more than enough whinin already.