It's quite simple really, I'm not sure how I am ever going to cope! Let me explain. Before Mike was diagnosed it was him that did all the gardening, not because I didn't want to, but because my poor back just cannot cope with more than a very short period of bending (my own fault having had 5 kids.) For now that task has fallen upon my shoulders. I desperately want to do it properly and get my garden looking nice, but like I said after 30 minutes I'm in such agony that I end up sitting on the ground crying with frustration, angry at myself and at the myeloma for taking my gardener away. I'm tired and torn. On the one hand I want to do all I can to help Mike, but when that means running up and down stairs fetching and carrying, well quite frankly enough is enough, my back hurts, my joints are playing me up and yes I'm fatigued too!
Mike is convinced that once his SCT is over he will be as good as new, or better even! He imagines that once he is recovered he will be able to run a marathon, go down the gym three times a week, have perfect abs. etc. It reminds me of the old, old joke:
Can I play the piano once these are off?
A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands.
"Doctor," says the man excitedly and dramatically holds up his heavily bandaged hands. "Will I be able to play the piano when these bandages come off?"
"I don't see why not," replies the doctor.
"That's funny," says the man. "I wasn't able to play it before."
I think you get the picture!